I don't mean to brag, but I make a mean batch of Dehydrator Jerky every once in a while.  Here's all your uneducated ass needs to know to make Dehydrator Jerky.

Ingredients:
3 lbs Eye of Round or any other lean beef roast
Soy Sauce               2/3 cup
Worchester Sauce   1 T.
Liquid Smoke           1 T.
Dijon Mustard            1 T.
Cayenne Pepper      1/4 t.
Crushed Red Pepper   1/4 t.
Garlic Powder            1/4 t.
Dried Ginger Powder   1/4 t.
Onion Powder            1/4 t.
Black Pepper            1/4 t.

Optional/Experimental Ingredients:
Whiskey
Lime Juice (acids tenderize)
Rice Vinegar (see above about acids)
Sesame Oil

Directions:
Partially freeze the meat to make it easier to slice.  Once partially frozen, slice into 1/8 inch strips or a little thicker if you like a little more of a challenge when it comes to jerky consumption.  Mix all the ingredients together in a bowl before beginning the marinating process in a gallon sized zip-loc with the meat.  Refrigerate the meat/marinade mixture for at least 12 hours.  If you can, massage the meat (insert gross joke here) every few hours to ensure the marinade does its job.  When the marinade process is over, lay the meat strips on the racks of your dehydrator and let it dry for at least 12 hours.  If your meat is thick, give it a few more than 12 hours.  The desired product is a piece of meat that compresses very little when squeezed between your thumb and forefinger.  If the jerky is still spongy, give it another hour and try again.

     
 
24 chicken wings (about 4 lbs.)
Salt
Black pepper
4 c. vegetable or corn oil
1/4 c. butter
1/4 c. hot sauce (Franks)
1 tsp. white vinegar

Cut off tips and separate each wing at the joint. Sprinkle wings with salt and pepper. Heat oil in deep fat fryer or large heavy pot. When it's quite hot (360º to 400º), add 1/2 the wings and cook about 10-12 minutes, stirring occasionally. When wings are golden brown and crisp, remove and drain well. Add remaining wings and repeat. Meanwhile, melt butter in saucepan and add hot sauce to taste and vinegar. Place wings in a bowl with a lid, pour hot sauce over wings, cover bowl and shake. Serve with blue cheese dressing, celery and carrot sticks.

Mamma's Wings

aka So easy yo momma can have you make'em wings

Ingredients

1 bottle Italian Vinnagrette (anywhere from 12-16 oz., just some advice from one brotha to anotha, buy the most cheap you can peep out, don't no matta if it is paul newman, or western family)

1 bottle cayenne pepper type sauce, you know like the crystal, or Frank's, it don't matter just buy some today

1 bag of chicken wings

Da Process

Buy the wings. Let them wings thaw out if frozen. Take out a large bowl. Now this is the tricky part, you get all them wings in the bowl. You open your bottle of italian vinnagrette. You open your bottle of hot sauce. you pour the vinnagrette over the raw uncooked wings. You pour the bottle of hot sauce over the raw uncooked wings. You take a large spoon. Now Don't spank anyone with it, not hard anyway.

Stir the hot sauce/vinnagrette/wing combination in the bowl. Desparately and at all costs fight the temptation to dip your finger in the sauce and lick it. At this point in the preparation the raw chicken might contain some sort of bacteria.

With any luck you are an experienced recipe reader. If not you just learned a lesson. Always read a recipe all the way through before beginning. You must be sure to preheat your oven, easy bakes powered by 120 watt lightbulbs are suitable, to 425º. Now find a large pyrex, the clear seemingly unbrekable glass type material, baking dish. Spread yo wings brothas and sistas. Spread them evenly in the pyrex. Spread all the sauce in there too! 

Slide them in the oven (still in the pyrex). Turn the light on perriodically. As they start to bubble turn them over once. Then give them periodoc turnings. The end visual goal for the most bling bling taste ever is golden brown on all sides. 

If you see one starting to blacken slightly turn the dang thing over. When all the wings no longer have an unhealthy white glow, and the meat is fallin off them bones, take the wing dings out. They is done! This recipe has been brought to you by the I can't believe it's that easy foundation, and Public Broadcasting, as well as the good people at 3m and Tyco. Suitable for preparation by ASIMO everyone's favorite robot from Honda.